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Friday, July 04, 2008/3:13 PM

To YOU who have Netflix,

I say, "LEARN HOW TO HANDLE A DVD!". I love my Netflix account. Its awesome. The library with which they have is mind boggling and the convenience is wonderful. HOWEVER, there is one ant at this cinema picnic and it's FELLOW SUBSCRIBERS.

Seriously I can't tell you how many times I've received a DVD that's covered in stick, disgusting fingerprints. They vary from 'whoops i bumped my fingers on the bottom of the DVD" to "Heh, i just wiped the DVD along my Butt, Her huh!". Grossness aside, my real complaint is how my 2001 SONY DVD player can't handle reading through a smeared fingerprint (or even a clean print for that matter). She plays fine and if you treat your DVD's as you're suppose to, she's wonderful. I'm not about to buy a new DVD player just to cowtow to the idiots out there that use this service. I realize i can easily grab some rubbing alcohol and (gently) whip it clean with a kleanex, but frankly I'd rather not have to run upstairs open the bathroom cupboard clean the dvd, run back downstairs and then test it to see if THAT works.

What does it do, you ask? Not only do films skip but often they'll freeze or even jump back to the opening credits. I can't tell you how many times I've been engrossed in a film when suddenly POP we're listening to the FOX drum roll.

So please, this is my plea to you who have Netflix. Have a heart and save us all the aggravation. Just follow these quick easy steps when you rent (this goes for Blockbuster or Hollywood video renters too, as i use to work there and have had the Next renter yell at me for something YOU did).

1. Don't touch the DVD until you've AT LEAST wiped your hands on your pants (if you can't be bothered to wash that is).

2. Stick your finger in the hole in the middle (its like a donut. Use that to your advantage)

3. Place the TIPS of you free fingers (remember one is in the donut hole) and lightly hold it by its edges.

4. place it in either your player or the case. DON'T put it on the table. DON"T put it on the floor (this is how they get cracks, scratches and snatched by the family pet).

follow these four steps and i think you'll find that a) good karma is a great thing and b) if more and more of us do this there will be less DVDs out there that are disgusting and skipping.


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