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Monday, January 30, 2006/9:25 AM

Had a blast this weekend doing absolutely NOTHING. I don't think I've watched sooo many films (and happily with friends! So I wasn't a complete loser this weekend lol). Anyway, as a gift to humanity I figured I'd do a quick rundown of the films that I watched this weekend (some were just awful so I'm saving you the 5 or 10 bucks) .

The two films we watched Saturday are as old as the hills and therefore most of you have probably already seen them but I figured I'd do a "refresher" for you.

Blair Witch Project.
AHHHHHH!! This is an awful film. And I know that's like saying... the sky is blue. But just incase you were ever wondering... yes it is still awful after the 5th viewing. On the other hand if you have enough people in the room you can really rip on it. So hey, that's entertainment.

The Silence of the Lambs.
I can't believe that there are still people who haven't see this film!! Excellent, well done... and not a bit boring. God it had been years since I'd seen it, so it was a nice little trip down memory lane. Me... watching this on a borrowed VHS tape from a friend who had HBO, 4pm broad daylight... still cowering on the couch with a blanket and jumping out of my skin when... well.. when Lecter jumps out of his skin in the ambulance. I think I screamed and ran into the kitchen. Happy to report that this didn't happened during this weekend's viewing. However, I did enjoy a lovely laugh with friends about what his "I ate his liver" speech would have been like had he been cockney. lol... amusing indeed.

Underworld
I went to the theaters to see this is the first time and thought, eh... not bad. I don't think i'll buy it but I'm not going to beat up the usher and demand my money back... though that could still be fun. Preparing myself for the viewing of Underworld Evolution, I borrowed this from my friend. and upon further inspection I surmised that it is still an "eh" movie that well... it kills a couple of hours without leaving any residual effects on your psyche.

Okay now to some more recent things which you may or may not have seen.

Underworld EVOLUTION (basically Underworld 2)
I would like to say that this film was better than its predecessor. I'd like to say that I enjoyed this film thoroughly... I'd like to say that this is the best thing for Tony Curran's career EVER.

I'd like to say that.

But I'd be a big fat liar.

NOW it wasn't bad. It wasn't... anything. As Jesse, Julie, Bryon and I filtered out into the theater hallway we seemed... numb. Perhaps it was disappointment. Julie said it best when she said (and this is not a direct quote mind you) "It shows what kind of an emotional investment I had in this film when I could have cared less when I thought an important character had died."
Yes I know a million of you are screaming SPOILERS.... but I didn't say who or whether they did or did not die or even HOW important they really were, so don't go off half cocked. It could have been jojo the mute boy who flips some important switch saving humanity, whatever... that's the kind of film this was... one that well... you just don't really care if someone spoils it for you.

Which really makes me mad. Why you ask? (okay maybe you didn't ask, but I'm telling you anyway as this is my blog and its here for me to vent lol). Tony Curran.

I fricken adore Tony.

Now ask me who he is. Yeah I know many don't know him by name. BUT you know him if you've ever seen: Blade II, The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (although he was invisible for most of that lol), the 13th Warrior, or the remake of The Flight of the Phoenix. So trust me you'll know his bright ginger hair anywhere. Anyway, he was granted a VERY large role in this slightly ho-hum vamp/werewolf film. Should have been great. He did great.... just well... ho hum.

So to cleanse ourselves from the boredom that was UE, Bryon, Julie and I (Jesse suddenly realized he should be prepared for Monday's class he was teaching) returned to their house to watch more films (cuz well... why not? I read for fun... and work all day Saturday... I can't rest on Sunday?) And here is the kicker. The films we saw at their place were 10 times better than the one we paid for. Well... one was the other... well we'll get to that.

Serenity
Joss Whedon (is that spelled right?)... you are a strange, strange man. Firefly was a television show (much like the first star trek) that was before Burbank (the place where MOST TV decisions are made) time. Rather than wait for the numbers to come, they sorta kicked you out the door and with it... a pretty fun show. I will admit I am part of the problem. I would only occasionally watch the show (you'll forgive me I hope as I did NOT get Fox.. and later - meaning now- did not get the Sci-fi channel). However I freely admit that if the Sci-Fi channel had a night where they played Firefly, Farscape and the new Battlestar Galatica... I would become a hermit on said evening (providing I was given free cable).

Sooooo, I went into this film thinking... how the hell did Joss get the funding to make a film about a show that nobody wanted (except the fans). AND how good could this possibly be?

The answer... pretty good.

Okay it's not Shakespeare (lets be honest here, Joss is the king of the one liner... see buff the vampire slayer). It's not even Chuck Palahnuk (whom I admit is not the GREATEST write, but is entertaining as hell) But it is FUN.

When did films stop being fun? When did we have to always go to the dark places, or the serious places? When did we have to be PC and make sure that we have equal amounts of any race within the cast? When did we stop just having good characters and not give a crap if they were asian, african, mexican, floridian? Well welcome to serenity. Yes, Joss gives us a world where all the races have blended (and in doing so inter-mixed languages too). But the best part... THAT"S NOT THE PLOT! This isn't about that. This doesn't get dragged down into a "look at us, look how we're representing everyone, it's it obvious and wonderful?" mentality.

Nope.. this is about just going out there and shooting things... robbing banks, racing through space... and well... um government brainwashing?

Okay so Joss does sorta get political in this. It's very anti-government with wiffs of a thumb of a nose to our current tell us what to do government. BUT also it's just him setting the world just prior to the American Civil War... in space.

That's Serenity in a nutshell. Post US Civil War (western inspired clothing too) with blasters. Oh and a young psychic who was messed with by the government and turned into a killing machine.
Well it IS Joss Whedon. Father of Buffy and Angel.... what did you expect?

Anyway, it's worth a watch, but you might like it better if you try to catch the show on Sci-Fi first (thus knowing who people are) not that it's REALLY necessary as both Julie and Bryon were unfamiliar with it and said the liked it better than UE

Anyway nuff about Serenity. I enjoyed it greatly and would suggest it to anyone and WATCH FIREFLY ON Sci-Fi! And I'll keep hoping they make my Farscape/Firefly/Battlestar night lol

And finally...

The War of The Worlds
Okay I ADORE the 30s radio Halloween trick by Orsen Welles (and if you know me, you KNOW I love Orsen and old radio shows) But I have to ask Spielberg... why Tom Cruise? WHYYY!!

ANYWAY here is a quick list of the good things about this film:

And now the problems:

TOM CRUISE

bad acting, overacting and well if he's a dock worker I'm a proctologist.

SPIELBERG

What happened to you Steve? You use to be soooo cool (Goonies, Jaws, Indiana Jones) Then suddenly you became depressed... what happened to the happy aliens from Close Encounters? Can we get them to come back (fight the evil WW ones... now that would rock. ET throwing Reeses at these alien things)

The ACTUAL ALIENS

Um who created these things.? They had cute little faces on nasty insect bodies. Just kinda stupid. Not threatening as much as um... well I guess I wouldn't want to find that in my basement. Kinda like silverfish. Not something you really want to be around, but after the initial scream... yeah I'd just kill it. They looked kinda brittle.

So yes I guess this was another ho-hum movie that never really took off in my eyes. I was scared by the IDEA of an alien attack and I thought some of the shots were done well, but in reality the film felt like it died (about when they ran into Robbins actually) part way in and never quite got back on its feet. I do wish I had seen it in the theater though. I bet the sound from the death rays was deafening. Kinda like the green light in Mordor (sp?) in Return of the King when Frodo and Sam are trying to avoid Orks. That thing nearly popped my ear drum. It certainly shook my ribcage! Wow.

Okay, so that's it. Thats pretty much EVERY film we watched this weekend... and um did nothing else. Soooo tonight is laundry, dishes night (too bad you can't wash the dishes in a clothes washer... as I have no dish washer and no want to actually do the deed myself). Who knows what I'll watch tonight... probably nothing. I think I should go into detox for a while after a line-up like this weekend. lol... Well, at least I had fun. :)









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