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Saturday, September 25, 2004/3:10 PM

Again, it's been a while since I have returned to the namesake of this site. So as promised at the beginning of this crazy site, it's time to report some of the strange ob-zurd-vations I've picked up in the past few days:

1. Want a real scare, go into your favorite bar either BEFORE hours or AFTER closing when the lights are on. That's scary. Suddenly i'm glad i can't see where I am sitting.

2. There is actually someone in this world who is a) louder than me and b) can talk more than me! And i actually like this person! Frightening.

3. Never leave my friends unattended in your livingroom. After they leave you might find odd things like your stuff kermit doll wearing your riding helmet. Or (and this one was my favorite) your fencing foil stabbed through your dress mannequin. Luckily they only told me they had thought about that one, it was never actually done (they were afraid i might get upset). Although it would have worked, the mannequin as a split through the middle of the chest and back, nothing would have been damaged. Ah well, at least they respected me enough to not break my things...lol.

4. Sunny days come and go....they seem to come on the day i have to work and go on the day i don't. hmmm. no wonder i'm this shade of white.

5. In college (especially grad school) one never has 1 paper due. Rather you have 2 or 3 due within a few days of each other. Then nothing. A whole lot of sitting around waiting for the next paper to come and smack you upside the head. Not a nice feeling.

6. Working at the video store, i get to see everything everyone rents. Might i now take the time to say that i worry about our future generations. The stuff the professors have been renting lately makes me wonder if they are qualified to teach our children... Bubba Ho Tep? What the hay? People actually RENT that movie? I worry. If you don't know what it is...be glad. Here's a quick synopsis...think Elvis impersonator in retirement home with best friend, black JFK (yeah you read it) impersonator trying to solve a crime and fight...zombies? oh brother.

7. Sitting on the porch is sooooo relaxing...until the landlady shows up to mow the lawn. Then suddenly ya might feel as though you're some sort of southern slave driver straight from Gone with the Wind. After muttering a quick "fiddle-dee-dee", ya might want to make a quick retreat back into the house in an attempt to no longer feel bad that a woman older than your parents is slaving away in the backyard while you're sipping on Kool-Aid.

8. You know how they say you can bring a horse to water but you can't make em drink. I say you can walk a drunk home, but you might have to drag em. (this comes from watching some of the undergrads return home friday night. Our porch gives us a lovely view of the kiddies going to and fro... but i don't think they're talking about michelangelo...2 points to anyone who gets that reference!)

9. Hmm i'm drying up on #9 again....sorry.

10. Our campus has a bell tower. This is a semi-new addition and sadly I'm afraid it is not a welcome one. Not only does it irritate our instructors by playing lovely little bell ditties in the middle of the school day (my favorite is it's lovely rendition of let it snow let is snow....in the middle of may.) but it goes on for exactly 15 minutes after it counts the hour. WHY IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT IS HOLY WOULD WE NEED 15 MINUTES OF BELL MUSIC!!!! And the worst part about this bell is, even after it drives us mad and finally either one of the student and/or professors snaps, it does not offer a nice ledge to climb up onto and start picking off the student body with hallow points....okay...well maybe that part is a good thing ;)









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